Its good to be Lonely !

I truly believe, its good to be lonely, well not for an entire life, which in fact is impossible, but for some short periods in your life. By being lonely, i don’t mean not having friends or like an orphan or not having girlfriend etc but the situations where you are just alone, nobody to talk to, just you and yourself, surrounded by strangers/silence.
 
happy lonely
 
        I believe that everyone had the experience of being alone, whether its on a bus stop, eating alone in a hotel, going to trip alone(improbable!), sitting alone in a theatre etc. We all know how the experience changes when we are with someone close, like friends, it entirely changes even a boring situation into memorable moments. But Is being alone too bad as we think it really is (or as i thought/felt for a long time) ?Its quite essential to be alone for some intervals in your life. It suddenly makes you an independent thinker, a curios/analytical observer or a self analyst. No ones going to judge you, no friends to share your thoughts, no companion to tell your griefs.
        One thing i noticed about being with companions/friends is the ‘Isolation Effect’. You just completely ignore everything outside that friendly field circle. When being alone, you become more self conscious, that when you see some other friend circles shouting, screaming, you may think ‘Don’t they have any sense about how loud & noisy they are to the others around them’. Sure they don’t. Perhaps subconsciously you like to have a company while you consciously criticizes their frank behaviours.
        Being alone, will provide complete attention of brain towards observation, thinking and analysis, which when in a company it gets distracted by the protocols of relationships (ie making others happy, playing pranks, telling jokes, thinking about what others may think etc etc). One time i was alone in a shopping mall (actually with my parents who were shopping), i observed the various companions, friends, couples walking around. After some time, i started seeing patterns of their walking. Some were synchronized while others aren’t. I observed an interesting phenomenon (Maybe just some lucky happenings, neglecting silent evidence, ref: Black Swan), when 2 people are walking separately theres no observable sync, but when they come closer you could see some changes in patterns of both and gradually (wonderfully !) attain synchronization. You could actually see the real time calibration and synchronization in action, automatically, unaware of their actions. After that i tried to sync mine with others consciously but miserably failed.
        One of the most important service/consequences that loneliness provide will be the self analysis. I think it has both sides to it, the good and the bad (and maybe ugly) depending on how you see yourself & your actions. This mostly happens when you are failed or get harassed or get teased or get fired or something like that. You starts to evaluate your actions from different point of views. Why i acted liked that, why it affected me too much, what will happen tomorrow, why didn’t i avoid that etc. On the positive side it helps you realize your weaknesses, what went wrong, realization of stupid mistakes, thinking about positive effects But on the negative side it can lower your self confidence and abilities etc. Well choose wisely the way you think.
        So next time you feel alone, try to think about yourself, your surroundings, curiously observing & analyzing things and realize the wonderful opportunities if being Alone.

 

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4 Responses

  1. Wow .. Wondered to hear that from a 'friendly' guy like you Avi 🙂

  2. avinav says:

    most of this applies to me too! esp since i'm alone at home all d time 🙂 glad to know someone else feels the same way as i do..

  3. Thanks dude… Too much being alone i guess 🙂

  4. afsal ameen says:

    Gud thinking! 🙂

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